The Guardian
I struggled to come to terms with my mum’s death. Then I swam in the sea and suddenly felt connected to her 27 October 2026 at 14:00

I struggled to come to terms with my mum’s death. Then I swam in the sea and suddenly felt connected to her

27 October 2026 at 14:00

My mother was a keen swimmer, and she lived with depression. I wonder if she found the same respite in the water that has helped heal me since she passed away

It was early morning in late September, off the coast of Kaş in Turkey. Watching the slightly choppy sea from a boat, the last thing I felt like doing was embarking on another 5km (3-mile) swim. Mind fog had sapped my energy, and my mood was decidedly Eeyore-like. But as I pulled on my cap and flippers, adjusted my goggles and took the plunge, something shifted.

Head in the water, the knotted feeling in my throat began to loosen. Breathing came properly. There was respite.

The Guardian
My phone thinks my boyfriend is my ‘best friend’. It’s not alone | Patrick Lenton 29 October 2026 at 17:00

My phone thinks my boyfriend is my ‘best friend’. It’s not alone | Patrick Lenton

The Guardian

By: Patrick Lenton

29 October 2026 at 17:00

Being in a same-sex relationship can make you weirdly invisible. Queer identity shouldn’t be treated as abnormal

My boyfriend and I invented a game on our recent trip to Italy. We called it “invisible gays”, which might have been an attempt at some kind of word play around “gays” and “gaze” – but I was on holiday and feeling lazy, so I didn’t push it.

The game began when one night he took me out to a little trattoria to celebrate my birthday. It was a warm night, and fairy lights were entangled in the fragrant blooming flowers over our heads, and we drank good wine and ate bowls of perfect pasta, and there was candlelight, and it was so romantic I wouldn’t have blinked if two dogs had started smooching over a strand of spaghetti. Che bello!